Working the Working Mom Guilt

These past few weeks, we have had a number of activities going on that have nothing to do with the adults but everything to do with the kids.  And that means adults have to drive the kids from place to place.  Which, as we all know, isn’t exactly everyone’s favorite way to spend the weekend.

I heard one parent talking about how much she was dreading yet another carpool, and was feeling like everyone expected her to be the one doing the driving because she always does the driving.  Whether this is true or not, I don’t know.  Either way, I immediately offered to drive her kid to one of the weekend events.  She wasn’t asking, but I had no trouble offering.  The reason why I offered is the secret I am here to share with you.

Now, I’m not going to get into the debate of working moms vs. stay at home moms and who has it harder.  There are no winners when you go down that path.  We’re all moms and we have different challenges, and I all can say is if we help each other out, we all make out a lot better in the end.

Here’s the thing…as a working mom, I can’t often do carpools during the week.  Since my workplace is pretty far from the house, I’m useless when it comes to after school activities.  I know this, and I am so grateful that there are moms and dads and babysitters who are able to get my kids to play practice, soccer games and the like.  Because of this, I feel guilt, and the best way to assuage this guilt is to over compensate.  Party on the weekend and you’ve got other plans?  I’ll drive the kids both ways.  Soccer tournament starting at 6am?  I’m first in line to drive.  Want to do something with your older/younger kid and have no place to put the sibling for the day?  My door is open.  I’ve rearranged schedules to accommodate these kinds of things and I feel great doing it.  And don’t feel like you can’t come right out and ask me to help out, even if it seems inconvenient.  Whenever I can make the time, I’m thrilled to do so.    Heck, I’ve gotten into friendly disputes with other moms who try to monopolize weekend carpools.  No way, Jose, I’m doing some driving too.  Don’t count me out.

So let this be a lesson to you.  If you’re tired of doing the driving, know that I’ve got piles of guilt to work out, and the best way to do that is behind the wheel of a car with a bunch of sugared up tweens.  It’s the right thing to do.